Excuses, Excuses

Woah... check out that last post date - the 3rd of July. For anyone who follows this, you should know by now that this blog, while certainly short on the quantity, is never short on the quality. I like to think of it as the Bentley of blogs; I don't make many of em, but when I do, they sure are a doozy!

For those curious about my prolonged absence, I will share with you my latest adventure* - I was whisked away by a South American TV crew to Guatemala, where they made me the star of 'Who Wants To Marry A Penniless Writer?' or 'Quién Desea Casar un Escritor De Penniless?' as it was known there.

Turns out not many people (much less hot South American girls) did, so my prospects turned out to be an assortment of misfits and social outcasts. And a donkey.

I'll spare you the sordid details, but I will say that there was a lot of catfighting (Meowrrrr!) over me. In the end though, I just couldn't stomach the thought of marrying for the sake of TV ratings and a watermelon farm. That, and most of the contestants escaped from the compound on the first night.

So while the TV station was disappointed, I came back a stronger man, knowing that fame and watermelons aren't everything.

In case you're wondering, the donkey made it to round 3 before being eliminated by this girl who had her twin sister's head growing out of her side. I'm regretting calling it off... Conchita (the head growing out the side of Maria) was kinda cute. But a man's gotta do what a man's gotta do.

Till next time, keep it real folks.

*This may not have actually happened.